jennifer lopez has reportedly been dropped as a potential "american idol" judge because her demands were getting unreasonable. yeah. apparently, she was asking for the impossible, viewers. [ laughter ] you guys, a new report found that new york city's emergency subway intercoms take an average of 11 days to fix. however, subway officials claim it never takes more than -- [ inaudible ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] this is crazy. a krispy kreme employee in north carolina accidentally gave a customer $5,000 inside a donut box. yeah. when the customer opened the box, he was like, "where are my donuts? [ laughter ] i need my donuts!" [ laughter ] a farmer in idaho, unknowingly, watered and fertilized more than 300 marijuana plants. [ cheers and applause ] yeah, he had no clue. although, he should have realized something was up when his alarm went off and his rooster was like, "bro, i'm trying to sleep over here." [ laughter and applause ] and, finally, tiger woods' column in "golf digest" is back nine months after it was discontinued because of his sex scandal. it will be the same as